As a reformed Choleric, now would be a good time to remind my fellow driven individuals to find their humanity before it is too late. Do not let tragedy, failure or the loss of a friendship remind you that emotions, love and relationships are incredibly important. Much more than projects.

Too many Pastors in Nigeria are Choleric. Some place accomplishing stuff, over and above the thoughts, feelings and progress of church members. They forget there is no church without humans. So, when members leave, the Pastors move on with the knowledge that there are other humans willing to take their place. This inordinate focus on institutions instead of the purpose of those institutions must stop.

Please measure the impact of your church by the quantum of love within it, not the number of projects it completes or the quantity of souls it wins. The parable of the Sheep and Goats should give you an insight into what truly matters.

When Pastors complain about dissent “dividing the body”, they forget that some of their actions have already divided the body – the destruction of the humans within it. Dissent is simply a vocalisation of the damage that has already been wrought.

Many Choleric Pastors may also not appreciate the process and independence of healing. They want to counsel and pray you back together immediately. They rarely take therapy seriously. They do not see that mental health professionals work with God to heal, just like Oncologists do. They assume because they are strong, others should be. They lack empathy. They also assume they know what is good for you. They have a plan of action. Always interrupting, rarely listening. They will be taught by life and experience…eventually.