If you’re a multipotentialite with a strong need for perfection, chances are you will get overwhelmed and become prone to bouts of fear and anxiety. You may find yourself staring out of the window one day, wishing you could swap your life for that of a school bus driver. For a season, you want someone else to plan your route, and you crave the simplicity of doing just one clear job. You no longer want to know more than is required or do more than is necessary. And, you have little desire to manage people.
It’s intriguing how we constantly hear about the impostor syndrome that accompanies top performers. But rarely do we learn of the crushing fear and anxiety they struggle with too. There’s a dread that something will go wrong because it always does. And, the micromanagement that’s embedded in many tasks. So, such people are constantly in crisis mode; waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Then there’s the need for control, which increases stress, as life cannot be put in check. Slowly, things become hard to bear and daily work becomes a burden.
Over the years, I’ve learned to manage fear and anxiety in 10 ways.
The First Five…
1. I went through a year of therapy. It was super-enlightening as many times, it’s not just anxiety that weighs us down. We also obsess because we cannot understand its source. Finding root causes and gaining clarity is what therapy is especially good at. It uncovers meaning & reason and gives a plan of action that most performers need.
2. I decided, “Mi o le wa ku” and learned to accept what is possible now until I can attain greater levels of excellence. I also stopped caring about what other people think and ceased sharing my dreams with the unworthy.
3. I crashed my social media use to once or twice a week because the constant scrolling was causing headaches and emotional overload from bad news.
4. The book, Learned Optimism by Martin E.P Seligman transformed my life. I was able to shed the weight of pessimism and my tendency to catastrophize, for more open-minded optimism.
5. I pray and read the Bible daily. God’s promises center me. They provide an underlying equilibrium in times of intense uncertainty. They broaden my relationship with and trust in God; attuning me to a higher purpose. This encourages me to let go of control and to view what I do as part of a larger program. I am also assured that I’m not alone and this gives me the strength to face my fears.
The Next Five…
6. Everyday, I meditate for 10 minutes using the Headspace app. This calms my brain, eases my feelings of anxiety and brings me peace. If you struggle with silencing the voices in your head or with insomnia, then I strongly recommend regular guided meditation.
7. I end the day with journaling; writing about the things I’m grateful for, the meaningful activities I completed and what I found interesting. Taking stock helps me to assess how my day went and to organize my priorities or need for self-care. So if nothing pleasurable happens for days, my journal warns me that I’m running low on emotional fuel.
8. I fill my emotional tank by talking to or spending time with loved ones. A massage or exercise also physically removes the stress from my muscles. It’s important to regularly do something fun. With a full tank, you will find strength for unpleasant tasks that you would otherwise procrastinate.
9. Crying is cathartic and aids in relieving fear and anxiety. I cry with little provocation, especially when I’m watching movies or reading a book. It cleanses my soul.
10. I take decisions. Sometimes, when fear threatens to overwhelm me, I move forward. That act of progress liberates me as I realize things are not as bad as they seem.
So, these are 10 ways to manage fear and anxiety. For me, it’s work in progress. I hope they help you.
For more, please read https://www.subomiplumptre.com/manage-your-fears
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