You Gave Me Too Much Change

When I was growing up, I was taught that if you went to a store to buy something and you were given excess change, you returned it. In the same vein, if you overpaid, an honest cashier would return the extra to you. Honesty wasn’t something you rationalised. It was hard coded into your DNA[…]

Chat Connections

When I meet someone online, I either connect with them immediately or after some time. I almost always begin with chat. It helps me to gauge whether they can carry on a conversation and express themselves with words. In the first week, I make an effort to feel people out. I try to find out[…]

Preemptive Friendship

I learnt something a few days ago – never wait to be asked, to demonstrate friendship to friends. Just be there for them. You don’t need a special occasion. If they come to mind, pray for them. If they want to talk, call them. If they need you to be there, show up.

Forget Me Not, Dear Friend

In the Book of Proverbs, King Solomon cautions, “Do not forsake your own friend or your father’s friend.” The maxim brings to mind a conversation I once had with a friend. (I belong to a group of friends who have collaborated on many NGO projects in the last 10 years. Some of those people are[…]

Of Old & New Things

I have an abiding love for crunchy granola that I cannot fully put into words. I’ve also eaten Nasco Cornflakes topped with granola for years. My love for some types of food is consistent. It mirrors the way I love people. If I love someone or something, my love grows, unless it’s spurned. I’m yet to[…]

What Role do you Play?

If you consider friendship important; if you really understand its true value; if you place significant worth on your contributions, you will appreciate the roles you play in people’s lives and be content. There are friends you party with and those whose ideas you clarify over a cup of coffee. Both roles are important and you[…]

Validation

People say you shouldn’t follow the crowd. But when you’re different, you’re called strange or an odd-ball. You’re also left alone. I’ll never forget the day a “friend” reduced something I’d held dear for over 30 years into something foolish. He made me feel so small. In those moments when you doubt the things you stand for, you either draw closer to[…]

The Roundabout

I negotiated the roundabout in Lekki, narrowly missing a commercial bus. As I squeezed past, a jaywalker leapt out from nowhere and I braked hard to avert a disaster. Just like life, you sidestep some trouble only to encounter more soon after. Trial comes in waves and you wonder when you’ll finally be able to catch[…]

On Friendship

What is friendship, really? Is it companionship? Is it having someone who’s got your back or an ally in troubled times? Is it conversations or a travelling companion? I’m thinking about the type of friendship I miss and that I need in my life right now. I need a friend who shares my values. We may[…]