[Read Part 1 here]
I think the insatiable need for a relationship (as well as serial dating) may be connected to the fear of being alone and the need for validation, attention & love that should come from friends and a loving family. If you have never known a love without expectations, you would assume that the only love there is, is the quid pro quo kind.
When I started dating, one of the things I experienced was the feeling of being “discarded”. I would meet a really nice guy and we would have a wonderful conversation. But immediately it became apparent that I was not right for him or vice versa, he would disappear. No follow up call, no fly-by hello. Just radio silence.
I was brought up to believe that everyone has inherent value and that I shouldn’t view men through the sole lens of, “Is he marriageable or not?” Nowadays, I’m being told that “friendship” (between a man and woman) is a toxic word. If a person has no sexual or relationship value, they should be dropped.
It isn’t every woman who is out to take a man for a friendzone ride – who desires to spend his money or enjoy his attention with no intention of dating him. Some women can pay their own way and believe that even if they are not suited to man romantically, they can be a friend, do business with him or any of the 1,001 things real people do besides having sex and marrying.