My Love Language

Today, I had a startling insight. My love language isn’t gifts. It’s quality time and words – unhurried conversation and words of affirmation. The type of conversation where you’re falling asleep, but I keep plying you with coffee because I’m enjoying your company so much. My attraction for a person seems directly proportional to the[…]

Learn to Walk Away

Three years ago, two quotations redefined the nature of my friendships. It was the year I decided I couldn’t get along with a passive-aggressive person in intimate quarters. I would not accept an adult who uses silence, moods, records of wrongs and their own version of events as manipulative weapons in friendship. I can’t remember[…]

Friend Zone is Not a Dirty Phrase

In my experience, the “getting to know you” phase ends very quickly in Nigeria, when there’s no sex on the table. Conversation either stops completely or in some rare cases, morphs into a refreshing friendship or business relationship. Amazing what happens when sex isn’t the only thing doing you. I don’t know if the universe[…]

You Need Values to Truly Succeed

Here’s what I learned in over two decades of running projects – many organisations underestimate the personal drive, loyalty and sense of responsibility that’s required for a successful venture. They assume process makes projects run. No. Character does. Projects are run by humans with value systems. In the same vein, many young people assume values[…]

Scandal!

I watched the last five episodes of Scandal yesterday. I was really curious about how it would end. When the series began, I really liked it and then when the plot became overly complicated and the values became suspect, I stopped. I consume the arts primarily for inspiration. When they vex me more than they[…]

Why am I Unhappy?

I’ve been unhappy for days. While I’m not gung-ho or happy-go-lucky, I have an equilibrium that has developed over years. When my parents died, God stood between me and my grief. I could sense him lurking about. His presence has a way of calming me. As I studied the Bible, I found daily devotionals formulaic,[…]