Today, I had a startling insight. My love language isn’t gifts. It’s quality time and words – unhurried conversation and words of affirmation. The type of conversation where you’re falling asleep, but I keep plying you with coffee because I’m enjoying your company so much. My attraction for a person seems directly proportional to the[…]
I’ve stopped thinking it odd that I can’t relate to 90% of worship music. Apart from the fact that African sing-songing, negro spirituals and soft white rock aren’t my default musical genres, I think the “problem” is how I met God. I didn’t meet God as “God”. I met him as a friend. I don’t[…]
If you run a growing business that needs to hire middle-level managers, this is for you. Please look for people who have a combination of these qualities which cannot be taught or which only need to be taught once: Wisdom, political savvy, intuition, responsibility, drive, intellect and maturity. Beyond skill which you can pay for,[…]
Three years ago, two quotations redefined the nature of my friendships. It was the year I decided I couldn’t get along with a passive-aggressive person in intimate quarters. I would not accept an adult who uses silence, moods, records of wrongs and their own version of events as manipulative weapons in friendship. I can’t remember[…]
In my experience, the “getting to know you” phase ends very quickly in Nigeria, when there’s no sex on the table. Conversation either stops completely or in some rare cases, morphs into a refreshing friendship or business relationship. Amazing what happens when sex isn’t the only thing doing you. I don’t know if the universe[…]
I worry about social media feminism discussions. I used to wonder why some of the discussants devolve into personal insults when gender issues are discussed. After all, they are not related to the people they are arguing with, are not marrying them and may never even meet them. Then it hit me. If we discount[…]
Here’s what I learned in over two decades of running projects – many organisations underestimate the personal drive, loyalty and sense of responsibility that’s required for a successful venture. They assume process makes projects run. No. Character does. Projects are run by humans with value systems. In the same vein, many young people assume values[…]
It’s so difficult to explain to folks that money doesn’t guarantee happiness. The typical response is, “Let me make money first, so I can find out.” Happiness lies in relationships – with friends, family, society and God. That feeling of being valued, understood and recognised for who you are. People rarely tell you that money[…]
God, I need to make progress. I want to press forward. I am tired of standing still. I am weary of hoping for the best. I no longer want frenetic activity with no result. I don’t want to be like a swimmer who flails around with no forward movement. I need change. God, show me a[…]
I love sci-fi. I believe in the inviolability of the human will. I don’t think God can be fully understood. God doesn’t seem restricted to labels or fit into boxes. But, so many people passionately seek to understand him, so they can relate with him better. One thing has always fascinated me about God –[…]
