My Love Language

Today, I had a startling insight. My love language isn’t gifts. It’s quality time and words – unhurried conversation and words of affirmation. The type of conversation where you’re falling asleep, but I keep plying you with coffee because I’m enjoying your company so much. My attraction for a person seems directly proportional to the[…]

The King is my Dad

I’ve stopped thinking it odd that I can’t relate to 90% of worship music. Apart from the fact that African sing-songing, negro spirituals and soft white rock aren’t my default musical genres, I think the “problem” is how I met God. I didn’t meet God as “God”. I met him as a friend. I don’t[…]

Learn to Walk Away

Three years ago, two quotations redefined the nature of my friendships. It was the year I decided I couldn’t get along with a passive-aggressive person in intimate quarters. I would not accept an adult who uses silence, moods, records of wrongs and their own version of events as manipulative weapons in friendship. I can’t remember[…]

Friend Zone is Not a Dirty Phrase

In my experience, the “getting to know you” phase ends very quickly in Nigeria, when there’s no sex on the table. Conversation either stops completely or in some rare cases, morphs into a refreshing friendship or business relationship. Amazing what happens when sex isn’t the only thing doing you. I don’t know if the universe[…]

You Need Values to Truly Succeed

Here’s what I learned in over two decades of running projects – many organisations underestimate the personal drive, loyalty and sense of responsibility that’s required for a successful venture. They assume process makes projects run. No. Character does. Projects are run by humans with value systems. In the same vein, many young people assume values[…]