Everything we are not

marriage_blog

Good questions to ask anyone you’re considering a relationship with are, “Paint me a picture of marriage. What do you see? What does it mean to you?” The picture they paint usually reveals their ideology, values and the things they consider most important in life.

Some people imagine a white picket fence, 2 children and a dog. Others imagine adventures in the Balkans with no domestic encumbrances. Our inability to accept who people are makes us chase pipe dreams.

I have a friend who is the most happy-go-lucky person I know – very adventurous and spontaneous. Men like her. I once asked another friend why he was hesitant to propose to her and he said because she’s not “traditional” enough. I gave him a resounding knock on the head.

He couldn’t see that the things that make the lady who she is are also the things she’s not. The typical “traditional” lady wouldn’t think about gallivanting through Tibet. She’d be thinking about having twins and choosing curtains. These are stereotypes but you catch my drift.

We keep looking for that “unrealistic” person that combines disparate qualities and values. Even if they existed, there’s such great competition for such blended personalities that you must honestly ask yourself, “Would such a person, with all the choices available to them want imperfect me”?

I believe everyone is special, beautiful and very worthy. They deserve to be celebrated and to be happy. So, anytime you meet someone or fall in love, remember, everything they are is because of everything they are not.



Unfortunately, I cannot moderate comments on my blog at this time but I invite you to connect with me on Twitter or Facebook